Furious, the king returned to the palace and gave the order to fire the professional. Then he summoned the farmer and offered him the prestigious and high paying job of royal forecaster.The farmer said, “Your Majesty, I do not know anything about forecasting. I obtain my information from my donkey. If I see my donkey’s ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain.”So the king hired the donkey. Thus began the practice of hiring dumb asses to work for the government and paying them outrageous salaries to occupy its highest and most influential positions.The practice is unbroken to this day.Compliments of limabMy flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who was camping it up outrageously. He seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us “Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he’ll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you. The other effect of what happened to poor Hal was that my mother gotparanoid about my laying around reading. That was what parents thoughtin those days, that polio was somehow something you got from lazingaround or that lazing around was a symptom of it. So, they wanted you onthe go all the time. For me, activity was stickball in the street andrunning. I was a terrific runner for a super skinny kid. That had partlycome, as I said, from being a smart fella, actually. I got chased afterschool so many times! At the beginning of every school year, about thetime we had our first test, I'd always have kids chasing after me, madat me because I'd gotten a 100 or an A+ on a test and they'd hadtrouble. I never bragged but those dopes hated me just the same.Like I say, at the beginning of each year, I'd get chased a few timeswith kids really intending to punch my lights out. But, as the year wenton it was really more of a game. They'd chase me and I'd sprint awayfrom 'em and even if I got.
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